It's a question that comes up in our house fairly frequently these days.  Two great books have THE answer.  I just read Yes, Your Teen is Crazy : Loving Your Kid Without Losing Your Mind, by Michael Bradley.  I loved it, because it gave me concrete ideas for dealing with smaller problems while identifying the larger problems that I need to avoid - and how to tell the difference.  It assured me that yes, the modern world and biology are both doing their parts to make my teenager crazy and to drive me there too.   Now my daughter should read Yes, Your Parents Are Crazy! : A Teen Survival Guide, by the same author, for the other side of the story.   Which is the best book?  Another topic for a "discussion"!