(from www.parentingwithoutpressure.com)
Great Expectations
     The holiday season is a special time for enjoying our family and friends and celebrating traditions. However, it can also be a time for unrelenting stress. 
     
     A common mistake made by many is trying the recreate the perfect Norman Rockwell holiday. The house is beautifully decorated with outdoor lights and an exquisitely trimmed Christmas tree; numerous presents, all carefully chosen and meticulously wrapped are displayed under the tree; the holiday meal, fit for a king, includes all the old-time favorites; and everyone is in a festive mood. Picture perfect, maybe, but is it realistic? Is this scene applicable or even relevant to your family today? If you and your family create stress by trying to meet unrealistic expectations, make a firm commitment to do things differently this year.

• Recognize the signs of stress. These include ineffective coping, such as becoming depressed, irritable, anxious or inability to concentrate. Stress related illnesses include headaches, high blood pressure, neck and back pain and stomach aches. Eliminate the threat of stress by putting yourself in control, rather than letting things just happen. 
• Keep family expectations realistic. Don’t allow your family’s holiday expectations to be determined by extended family, friends, or the media. Instead, focus on your family’s strengths and be realistic about what works for your family as a whole. 
• Give yourself permission to say, “No.” Be realistic about what you can and cannot accomplish. Say “I’m sorry, but this won’t work for me right now.”
• Watch your diet. Eat lightly, more often, and include complex carbohydrates for energy. A diet high in carbohydrates increases the body’s supply of serotonin, a brain chemical known for its calming effect. Additionally, drink plenty of water and avoid overloading on the sweets, and snacks filled with empty calories.   Also, cut back on stimulants such as caffeine and nicotine.
• Exercise. Exercise can rid the body of excess tension, help promote relaxation, improve cardiovascular function, and increase energy and stamina.

• Recognize the signs of stress. These include crankiness, irritability and a change in appetite or sleep habits. 
• Provide structure. Kids thrive on routines, predictability. Therefore, structure is important for children especially during the holidays. Also, make sure kids get their sleep and take a nap or have a “quiet time” each day.
• Set Clear Guidelines. Gently remind children of your expectations before going to grandma’s or the mall. Then, remember to praise, appreciate, encourage and acknowledge the good behavior. 
• Give attention freely. Love is spelled TIME. Laugh, cuddle and play with your kids. Let them choose their favorite games, activities or book to share with you and have fun.
• Encourage physical exercise. Exercise releases tension for children as well as burns excess energy! Plan daily for a minimum of 30 minutes of outside activities and play. 
• Watch your children’s diet. Limit foods that may affect behavior, such as refined sweets, caffeine (found in chocolate and soft drinks), artificial preservatives and chemical coloring. Keep plenty of fresh fruit and raw veggies on hand for snacking.